


I'll Keep You Safe

by blxrrystark



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Coping, Flashbacks, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, References to Depression, Sad with a Happy Ending, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Suicide, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-11-08 20:22:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17987927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blxrrystark/pseuds/blxrrystark
Summary: If he couldn't succeed to do the one thing that gave his life meaning, then what was his purpose? Would he simply just become a burden?Maybe that's how Tony felt.Did he feel alone? Worthless? Is that why he gave it all up?Tony wasn't alone though. He wasn't worthless. He was everything. He just never realized that.That was Steve's job. And he failed. What a mess.





	I'll Keep You Safe

**Author's Note:**

> Make sure to read tags!!  
> I don't think this will get super dark, but there will be mentions of a depressive-mood and of suicide. I will 100% make sure to give notice of any warnings ahead of time, but of course read with caution. I myself don't want to get triggered so I really don't think there will be anything too intense but still just wanted to let you know. I'm such a bad writer, sorry! I don't write a lot agh so sorry for any mistakes.

What is the meaning of life?

Steve believed that it was different for everyone. That was the only thing that could make sense to him.

The meaning or purpose of your life is what you cared for- whatever kept you going. No matter what you were going through, you could have that one thing that made all the struggles and hardships worth it.

For Steve, the purpose of life was the people. For him it was all about surrounding yourself with people who make you happy and who will support you.

Oh, how Steve loved and cherished his people. He would do anything for them, the ones who were worth it at least. He felt obligated to be there for his friends and family always, and had a constant need to protect whomever he could from whatever he could.

And when he failed to do that, well, to put it simply, he felt like a failure. Like he had been unable to fulfill the reason he was put here, his purpose left worthless.

 _God_ , did Steve feel like a failure now.

\---

Steve got up off his bed, stepping over the piles of miscellaneous items that had crowded the floor of his room over the past couple weeks to open his window blinds in hopes he may come upon something worthwhile.

All he found was just a bleary, cloudy sky and the people of New York headed to work, seemingly miserable.

Steve sighed, noting how the weather seemed to at least match his own mood. He trudged back to his bed, and grabbed his phone off the bedside table, reading that it was only 6:30 AM.

He discounted the continuous missed calls and texts his friends had left, supposing he could probably sleep longer, if his brain let him. Sunday mornings were meant to be lazy anyway, he figured.

The next time he awoke, it was about 10:00 AM, and _surprise_ , Natasha was calling him. Reluctantly, Steve answered. He couldn't ignore it forever.

"Hello?"

"Hey! Steve..." Natasha let out a sigh.

"Is everything alright?"

"Well yeah, other than the fact you've managed to ignore Sam, Bucky, and I's calls and texts the past few days. Not at all like we were losing our minds worrying over you," Steve shook his head, no doubt he was going to get his ass whooped next time Nat had the chance.

"Sorry, I haven't been in the mood to talk or anything-"

"It doesn't matter if you feel like it, Steve! I was ready to bust open your door to make sure you were alive, " Nat sighed once again, calming herself, "Listen, I just want to see how you're doing.. after everything. You can't blame me and the others for worrying."

"Okay, I'm sorry. I'm fine. Can I please talk to you later?" He was already regretting his decision to answer his phone.

"Nope, if you hang up now I will in fact come to your house and pull your lazy ass out of bed, and that's a promise."

Steve huffed, accepting his fate.

"Okay, so Bucky, Sam, Clint, Thor and I all were talking, and we think it'd be good to go to school tomorrow. We want you to come too... if you can. We think you can, and you probably should."

"Nat, I don't-"

"I know, but you've been cooped up in your house for days and going to school may just help you get up and do something. We'll all be together and if anyone needs to they can leave early."

"I'm just worried that there will be too much of... _him_ everywhere."

"...As in- at school? or-"

"No, everywhere as in _everywher_ e... I hate being constantly reminded about it."

"Oh.. _Steve_ , " Nat breathed, faint and quiet, "Listen, what if I come over later? I can bring others if you want.. or not of course. I can help you clean up a bit? I'm guessing you haven't been the most tidy person recently... and maybe we can talk a bit. Might help."

"Y-yeah, sure."

"Okay.. okay! Great, um I'll be over in like an hour or two? And if you feel a bit better later maybe think about going to school tomorrow? Or maybe I could take you somewhere, at least get out a little bit."

Steve hummed in acknowledgment and hung up the phone with a "see you later," plunging himself back under his covers without a care of the world around him.

\---

If he couldn't succeed to do the one thing that gave his life meaning, then what was his purpose? Would he simply just become a burden?

_Maybe that's how Tony felt._

_Did he feel alone? Worthless? Is that why he gave it all up?_

Tony wasn't alone though. He wasn't worthless. He was everything. He just never realized that.

That was Steve's job. And he failed. What a mess.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, sorry this chapter is short! I have a bit of a plan for this fic, I don't really know how long it'll end up being though. If you could leave a comment on what you thought? Or any questions about it that'd be great too, Thank you! <3


End file.
